Your head like this. On your forehead, draw a triangle.
Always put your feet like that. You'll rise by yourself.
The best way to walk
Boys! What are you doing?
Go back inside.
Can't you see it's raining?
Summer 1960
Henri, is that you?
Yes, Princess. I came in through the garden gate.
You risked your life to join us. Henri, you're mad!
I am mad for you, Princess!
WELCOME TO THE CAMP
Fall in!
Didier, take it from: "I'm mad for you, Princess."
I'm mad for you, Princess.
Silence, fool. My father has numbered your days...
Quickly, now.
Put your shield down.
Shut up! And wipe your feet! Dacosta, your feet!
What's all this din!
What kind of savages are you?
I don't want to exaggerate, but the weather's lousy!
Watch out for colds. No colds, huh?
Outside they can be noisy.
Here I want peace and quiet!
That wasn't funny!
You're not in bed yet?
Sleep on the right side.
No pretending.
Aren't you ashamed to cry in front of your friend?
What are you doing here? Go to bed.
Now try to sleep.
Why are you still up? Go to bed!
Lights out! No more reading.
Good night!
- Shall we have a game? - No, I'm watching the film on TV.
You're watching the film? It's great. I've seen it six times.
- So you're plotting in the corridors? - What's that?
That, my dear son, is a suggestion box.
I'll speak about it tomorrow when we're all gathered in the courtyard.
It needs a touch of paint.
- For the farewell party? - That's right.
That's good. The kids will like that.
Are you watching the film?
I hate foreign movies. They bust my gut, if you know what I mean.
Stop it!
Deloux, shut up!
Tell us if we're a drag.
Yeah, be sure and tell us.
Just be quiet!
I don't get it. Fill me in, Deloux.
You're uneducated.
You're illiterate. He's just illiterate.
Shut up! If you don't understand, some of us do.
Deloux's getting mad.
I'm not kidding.
- Pain in the ass! - You're impossible!
So watch your lousy movie!
Come on, Philippe.
That's okay. I'm tired.
Stay! We were only joking.
Aren't you staying? You must see the end.
Good night, jokers!
He's got nothing.
What an act!
Not that I'm curious
but I've asked everywhere
How come blondes have black pubic hair
You're fucking idiots! Let's play. I've got two pairs.
Too bad. Full house, aces high.
We'll use his torch.
No chance, pal! Not on my batteries.
- Philippe? - Who is it?
- It's Marc. We need candles. - Sure, wait a second.
- I'm coming in. - No, wait!
What do you want?
Candles. The ones from your theater.
The lights went out. We want to play poker.
The chief's back!
Ah, candles!
Some guys do crazy things with candles.
- Are you one of them? - Piss off.
You're like Deloux. You like dirty stories.
That's what you think.
There are talkers and there are lovers!
What an asshole!
What are you doing?
He's pretty as a peach!
Are we going to play cards?
Remember my full house?
A ghost!
It's the storm. I can't sleep.
Are you going to deal?
- I'm dealing. - So deal!
They work better when the power's on.
Oh, yeah. Shit.
He's really out of it!
- You can play, too. - Thanks. I'll try to sleep.
Intellectuals!
Got anything to tell me?
Who? Me? What do you want me to say?
Philippe, come here.
I'll return your candles later.
Isn't it beautiful?
Not bad.
Touch it up with a bit of paint.
To hide the finger marks.
You stay there. You're hiding.
As soon as the princess and Henri join hands, you say your line.
Those spotlights, throw some light on the king.
Jean-Paul, take it from "Silence, fool."
Silence, fool. My father has numbered your days. Soldiers are after you.
Sweet princess, feel my heart.
Curse the day! What do I see, under my own roof?
My daughter with that scoundrel!
It's coming off.
Look, you're in a tragic situation.
Your daughter loves your worst enemy's son.
Be serious, you two. You're a couple in love.
Very funny.
Take his hand.
You, Jean-Paul, you're the girl. You must tremble before your lover.
Sweet princess, feel my heart.
Curse the day! What do I see, under my own roof?
Hang on a minute.
The best way to walk is our way to walk
One foot before the other, over and over again
Okay. That's enough. Shit!
If you're not interested, say so. I don't care.
We can do something else.
SUGGESTION BOX
Dear boys, dear teachers.
We are gathered here to discuss...
our farewell party.
I'm sure you must have noticed this...
this box. Like a letterbox.
You noticed this letterbox?
Quiet. Quiet.
It says:
"Suggestion box."
What does that mean?
It means everyone in the camp...
has the right and the duty...
to write on a slip of paper his suggestions and ideas...
so that our farewell party this year...
may be an exceptional success.
Everyone may put in as many suggestions as he wants...
through the slit in the box...
provided for that very purpose.
Let me finish.
A few days before the party...
we'll examine the riches in our box.
The suggestions will be weighed...
by the Teachers' Council, presided by me.
The person whose idea we adopt...
will be made Camper of Honor.
Your father has great ideas.
Wise and solitary Deloux, who likes the sound of the director's voice.
Oh, joy! May trumpets blare.
Pedagogically, it's sound.
You wait! The box'll be full of crap!
Get in line, you.
You think it's funny?
What's wrong?
- Tell me what's wrong. - It's Philippe.
- What's he done? - He won't talk to me.
That's why you're crying?
Then don't talk to him.
That way you punish him.
I want him to talk.
It's Marc. Can we come in?
Sure. Come in.
I'm returning them.
I'll put them... here?
Wherever.
- Your fiancée? - We're not really engaged.
Your girl, then?
She's cute.
- What's her name? - Chantal.
- He doesn't want to talk. - Not at all.
You can see he doesn't want to talk about her.
She has a sensuous mouth.
You're always reading.
All these books.
That's jerking off, my friend.
Come on, let's split.
Know what I think about bookworms?
What a lesson!
The other night I met a girl who knocked me out
She had big eyes, big blue eyes
She had a big nose, a big red nose
She had a little hole, round about her knees
So I sat down on her big webbed feet
Don't! Not on my phenomenology book.
I'm going to bed.
Me, too.
Going to bed?
Go on, Leni. Sing the blues.
- Who is it? - Philippe.
Come in.
The brave don't sleep.
- Were you asleep? - Yeah.
- I'll leave. - Shit, now that you're here, sit down.
What's wrong?
Sit down.
I'm sorry. I wanted to talk to you...
about something that's needling me.
What's needling you?
I know, it's late. It's dumb.
It's rather hard to explain...
but I think...
our groups shouldn't be so isolated.
Well spoken!
- Don't tease. - Not at all.
What I mean is...
we're each working with our kids in our own corners.
There's no contact between groups.
- And that's what's been keeping you awake? - Yes.
Why don't our kids play the same games?
Why do we each work on our own?
We should work together.
You see, if your group and mine worked in unison...
I'm here on a paid vacation. Education is not my line.
I see.
Can I take one?
Anyway, no...
it's too late.
The groups have been made up.
Forgive me if I say so, but...
your activities, singing, dancing, theater...
You do what you like, but I find that stuff a drag.
I'm sure my kids would feel the same way.
Why not try Deloux?
He'd love it.
Don't take it like that! You're one hell of a touchy guy.
It doesn't matter.
No, wait.
Is that all you had to say?
You want my kids to play with yours? That it?
- We could try. If you gave me a hand. - Where?
Let me finish.
If you help, I'll let my kids do athletics.
I've been neglecting sports.
- I'm guilty, in a way. - Excuse me?
Say that again, I didn't get it.
As the camp director's son...
Don't talk crap. Of course not.
I don't know...
I feel low.
You worry too much.
All those books don't help, either.
Am I the only one...
who has problems?
You know, it's funny.
How come you're telling me all this?
It's only natural.
I'm confiding in you because...
- everyone admires you. - Sure!
It's my big mouth. People listen.
Here, friend, have a drink.
So?
In fact...
I'd like us to be...
to be friends.
Friends?
Aren't we?
Doesn't come out easy, does it?
What does it mean to be "friends"?
It means what I said.
Getting our kids to play together.
Exchanging ideas.
So that's all!
Shit, I'm dumb.
I'm sorry.
What about favors?
I was saying...
there are some favors I could use, that you could do.
Of course.
- Got it off your chest? - Yes.
Then you agree?
What do you mean?
You need a favor?
It's unimportant.
I don't know. I don't know yet.
I might need something.
Now that we're friends.
It's always handy to have someone you can rely on.
Move away.
It's nothing.
We took good care of you. Tell your parents that.
You're going a bit far.
See, your little darlings aren't up to it.
Stop sneering.
Theater, this afternoon. It's calmer.
Now for the battle scene.
Marc's team, on stage.
You listening?
You follow the king. You two, come here.
Say your lines and turn to the general...
- We surrender. Spare my daughter. - That's it.
And at that moment, you fellows charge.
You know what to do.
We'll rehearse now. Don't forget, this is theater.
It's for fun. It doesn't count.
Okay, let's go.
Lights!
Go, Didier.
Sire, as fate has so decided...
I will be valiant to my last breath.
You have insulted my honor. One last time, give me back Isabelle.
Soldiers, be brave. The kingdom is at stake.
Spare my daughter.
- You love it! - It was your idea!
You're crazy!
Not mine. One of Deloux's boys lent it to us.
- Like nude girls? - Yes, I do.
It's a hell of a lot of fun.
I don't want you reading things like this. It's confiscated.
What the hell's this noise?
Siesta time. You all sleep on the right.
You've got no wind.
The theater, that was no accident, was it?
You planned it.
Don't get it. I planned what?
Why would I?
It amuses you...
to make fun of me.
Why?
Think I don't notice?
You do it all to piss me off.
You're baiting me.
Because you saw me that time.
Because you saw me that time in my room?
So you think...
I don't give a fuck about all that. It's none of my business.
Then why do you make fun of me?
You wanted me to do you favors.
What exactly do you want?
- And our great friendship? - I'm fed up with your insinuations.
In my room, nights, I do what you do.
The same thing as you, friend.
Maybe not to the letter.
- But I'm no worse off. - You don't look it.
Maybe you hide it better.
If I snuck into your room, I'd catch you at...
Yeah, what?
- Something. - What? What?
At some little private madness.
My beloved grandma, she'd say:
"You've got bats upstairs."
You've got bats upstairs!
"Bats upstairs" means you're nuts, you're crazy.
It's funny, all this was your idea.
"I want us to be pals, Marc. Friends."
Out of fear, you romanced me.
Afraid I tell everyone what I saw, eh?
You wouldn't.
Pathetic!
You're a real jerk-off.
You crap in your pants.
I want no part of you.
The camp director's bright-eyed son!
I want no part of you.
My love, you must absolutely find a way to come here on Sundays.
I absolutely need you.
DIRECTOR
Want anything?
I just thought, maybe...
Come in.
Want some? Here!
- Laugh's on me? - No, I swear it.
Come on, guys.
Gérard just told a joke. It's a bit dirty.
Listen, tell Philippe. You'll break up!
No, not twice in a row.
Gérard, tell the dirty joke again.
- Shall I? - Maybe he already knows it.
It's about a guy who's married.
One night, after 10 years of marriage...
he gets in bed with his wife.
Suddenly, he asks her to turn over...
and he fucks her in the ass.
The woman isn't used to this. She's surprised.
Anyway, she lets him do it. She's a nice woman.
When he's done, the guy turns over and goes to sleep, without a word.
Next day he doesn't say a word to her.
Following night, same thing.
Turns her over, fucks her in the ass.
Then he falls asleep again without saying a word.
It goes on like that...
for days, months, a year.
Every night he fucks her in the ass without ever speaking to her.
Then after a year of silence...
she can't stand it...
she wants an explanation.
She says: "Listen, Alphonse...
"you can take me any way you want.
"But, after all, I'm your wife.
"Say something to me. I want you to talk to me."
And the guy says: "I don't talk to people who take it up the ass!"
Can you lend me your songbook tomorrow?
What's up?
I asked if you'd lend me your songbook.
You might answer!
"I don't talk to people who take it up the ass."
They're dumb!
What do you want now?
Shit, cut it out, I've had enough.
- It's cold. - Stop, that's enough.
It's really cold.
Don't pretend, you bastard. Answer me.
You bitch and complain...
but at least you've got hot water in your room.
What do you want from me?
What?
Say that again.
What's the favor?
I don't know. I don't know yet.
I wonder what I could ask you.
Everything else okay?
What?
In spite of what you think...
I didn't tell a soul.
I'm a good guy.
I'm sure you did.
Think what you want.
Hey, your girl's coming tomorrow.
What's her name again?
I think she's swell, pretty Chantal.
Is she a good proposition?
A great fuck?
Does she suck?
You don't have to blush.
It happens when a guy's in the sack with a chick.
Love, tits 'n' ass.
Don't you know about all that?
Anyway, I'd be surprised if you ever laid a finger on Chantal.
I bet you've never fired one off.
She must miss it.
Unless she's getting it in Paris. That's it.
She gets it from other guys. It's only human!
If someone had said that to me...
I'd already have busted his face.
You didn't even flinch.
You're repulsive.
I'm through with our meetings in my room. Get lost.
Get lost, I said!
You haven't changed in a month.
What do you mean?
Still as talkative!
You know, I really liked your letter.
Good thing I made a move.
It's tough to get a word out of you.
Girls don't write first!
Your letters used to be much sweeter.
You didn't overdo it!
"You absolutely must come."
But I liked that "absolutely."
I'm glad you cut your hair.
It suits you.
Listen...
I've booked a room for this afternoon.
What on earth for?
Are you crazy?
Have you gone mad?
Well, I wouldn't dare.
We can't spend the day indoors.
It's going to rain.
What about the camp? I'd meet your friends.
No, thanks.
Your dad likes to see me.
Didn't you come to see me?
Oh, listen...
Remember Sophie?
She went camping with Jean-Claude. That girl's nuts.
- Did you know that? - I don't give a damn about Sophie.
Miss, the check, please.
No, it scares me.
It doesn't matter, I love you.
You'll miss it.
You know, I've been told the first time is often a flop...
for lots of people.
You believe that?
Don't worry.
See you next week.
I found a whole collection in his room.
Bravo, Deloux. Good work!
See me in my office.
Well, my friend.
How shameful.
It doesn't surprise me.
That guy never paid his rent, never flushed the toilet.
Pass the cheese.
Reminds me of a woman I was once madly in love with.
You got nothing to say?
I don't find it hilarious.
You find it sad, huh?
Don't strain yourself. There's worse.
Want my beans? I can't finish them. Pity, they're good beans.
No, thanks.
Come on, you love them. Good camp food.
- No, thanks. - Yes, thanks.
- I'm not hungry. - Eat some beans, eases the gut.
I absolutely must talk to you, bastard - Phil
I got a strange message.
If it's to make fun of me...
What do you want? You're after something.
I'm fed up. Game's over.
What's the "little favor"?
I'll suck your cock, if that's it.
- I don't want a thing. - Leave me alone!
Forget me.
I might kill myself.
If I do, I'll say it was because of you.
You made my life miserable.
What are you talking about?
I don't know what you mean.
Let's say I've forgotten. All right?
I just screwed you around a bit. Let's not talk about it anymore.
My pleasure. It's always a pleasure to shake the hand of a gentleman.
Our Sunday together wasn't the greatest.
Doesn't matter.
I still really want to see you again.
Something's the matter with you these days.
I think I must visit you more often.
I've arranged it so I can come again next Sunday.
And I hope it'll work out for the other Sundays, too.
Don't worry because we didn't do you-know-what.
We're a bit young. I think we need time to get used to each other.
Anyway, don't think I don't like you.
I love you very much. I love your body.
I'm not scared.
But all that seems rather low to me.
And there's nothing to do about it.
I hope you won't show this letter to anyone.
I love you dearly. Chantal.
You okay?
He came to fetch his chick.
I'm coming.
So you're Chantal.
He's told me a lot about you.
- So, you wanted to sneak off? - Not at all.
Sure.
I've organized a swimming match this afternoon. Come to the pool.
Do we have a choice, Officer?
I'm counting on you.
- Why the tracksuit? - I was on duty this morning.
Now we have to go to camp, so I can change.
It'll take me a second.
Chantal, my dear! How nice to see you.
Take care of the kids. I won't be long.
Doesn't always work.
How nice of you to come and visit us on Sundays.
- Where is Philippe? Did he dump you? - We're eating out. He's dressing.
- Are you engaged? - No.
- Then he's your boyfriend? - Lf you want.
- That's funny. - Why?
I'm just surprised.
Let me tell you...
a man with a needle in his eye...
doesn't give a damn about the fate of the British Navy.
If you see what I mean.
Why not eat with us today? Make an exception.
You don't like us?
What I don't like...
is the way you give orders and expect people to obey.
That one was below the belt!
Boy, she's rough, your girl. She won't eat with us.
We've booked.
The loner act, eh!
We don't feel like it.
We don't feel like eating with you.
What are you doing?
I'm locked in. The handle's broken.
I don't believe it!
You'll have to jump, pal.
It's not very high.
Don't do that!
Philippe, come down, right away!
Watch out!
Listen, you see that thing...
sticking out of the wall. The metal thing by the shutter.
No, not the nail. Watch out.
Further. There. Don't touch it.
Won't do you any good.
Careful. Your pocket.
Oh! He tore his pocket. He tore his pocket.
You okay?
He'd sooner die than tell us.
You coming?
You could be nicer.
Your whole lives you can eat together. Don't snub us.
See you at the pool!
More sauce?
What's wrong?
You were into some heavy talk with Marc.
What was so interesting?
I was telling the handsome Marc, that though I'm young...
a while back I was even younger...
and so was everyone else.
And I wondered what it all meant.
That it had to mean something awful.
Are you angry?
If it's any consolation, Marc stands for everything I loathe.
I find him cheap and pretentious.
You really want to go to the pool?
No more than you do.
So why don't we skip it?
Okay.
See you in a while, Dad.
We have to go.
My father's going to make a speech. He wants the whole camp there.
Swimmers, on your marks.
- What's wrong? - Headache.
Will you shut up?
Quiet!
My children...
I have something unfortunate to tell you:
Raoul Deloux is going to have to leave us.
Our colleague is guilty of a serious professional lapse.
In an establishment such as ours, that is unforgivable.
We must make an example of him.
I may at times seem harsh but you well know that my concern...
is fairness and justice.
I know that...
in life we all have our weaknesses.
Raoul Deloux...
we bid you farewell and goodbye.
In spite of it all, we will retain good memories of you.
Say a few words to them. They'd appreciate the gesture.
Mr. Deloux has a few words.
Shit! I hate you all.
I hate the lot of you!
He'll swallow his tongue!
Let me! Let me, I know how.
Take him away! He's repulsive!
Leave me alone. My suitcase.
Marc, do something, get them playing. Come on, move!
Get in the pool!
He's sick.
- Do something! - Okay, I'm going.
I want to throw up.
- Not in front of everyone. - I'll take him to the john.
- Me, too! - I'd rather you didn't.
Stay here. Wait for me.
Go on.
I can't.
I never can.
Force yourself.
Think about garbage, about shit.
Put two fingers in your mouth.
- You'll puke. - I don't like it.
You're a drag! Puke, I tell you!
There, that's better.
Leave me alone.
Why'd you throw me in the water?
You lied to me in the stadium the other day.
You're gunning for me.
Is it because of your girl?
Shut your big mouth.
And eave me alone!
Some gratitude!
You can say that again! Piss off!
Keep it down! Shithead.
You ordering me around?
You really make me feel like...
feel like...
kicking your ass...
humiliating you...
you poor little thing!
Look what you did.
Disgusting!
Eat your shit.
Eat it. Eat it!
- What's up? - I was helping him to puke.
- Let him be. - He shouted.
He's nuts. He says I hurt him.
Leave him alone.
But I do! I take care of him and he balls me out. Shit!
What a loser!
What are you doing with someone like that?
Don't come in. Leave me alone.
I wasn't going to let you drown, you know.
How disgusting!
I can't say I'm proud of it.
You'd think we were giving awards for stupidity and nastiness!
If their parents saw this, God help me!
No shade of vileness is missing!
For my own amusement, I classified them.
Here's Banality:
"Whoever reads this is an asshole."
Please, there's more to come! Slanders:
"Marcassin is a nitwit."
Enigmas:
"The camp stinks and the director shits in his pants."
Whatever that means.
Here we have Insults:
"Philippe's campers are sissies."
Philippe says, "Thank you."
Pornography:
"Let's see the nurse bare-ass."
All in all, I found only two suggestions, if I can call them that...
for our farewell party. Listen:
"For the party, let's eat ourselves sick!"
This one's more soulful:
"A cock contest."
I know it's hilarious.
I can't laugh. I have chapped lips.
I'm still waiting for your suggestions.
We could...
go on an excursion?
Hell, no. That means bus rides.
Kids puking all over.
- What about a tournament? - Football!
It has to be a change. We play football all the time.
- A picnic? - Would that interest them?
- It would have to be outstanding. - With nice food.
How about, you know...
a fair with booths.
With things to win.
What about money?
Where will they get the money? You'd have to pay at these booths.
Otherwise...
And it wouldn't sit well with the parents...
who already have to pay for their kids' vacations...
to have to pay more for our little party.
Why not the suggestion in the box?
The cock contest?
No.
A great meal.
Dull!
How's this for originality?
Three sweets instead of two with Sunday dinner.
Listen, Hervé. We don't need any nasty wisecracks.
Keep them to yourself.
And a paper chase?
Enough of this. Can I speak?
How come no one mentioned it?
A costume party.
We'll invite the villagers and the parents.
Everyone likes dressing up.
We can do it outside.
Will you believe that I've calmed down?
Things weren't so good before.
We're having a camp farewell party.
Don't come.
You must have had enough of my shenanigans!
We'll meet in Paris in a few days and I'll explain all.
Forgive me for not being simpler and easier to understand.
I wish I were.
Tender kisses.
Forgive me, but I'll be there.
You'll see, I'm right.
I want to know what you want.
I want to know all your secrets...
to understand and love them, to show you mine.
If we could spend a night together, sleeping like kids...
all would be well.
That's why I'll be there.
That's why I love you.
Ah, my little Chantal...
I bet you've never tasted whiskey in your life. Come with me.
- What about Phil? Isn't he here? - He's coming.
Where is he?
Dressed up as what?
You'll see.
Ask me to dance!
- Was that meant for me? - Who else!
Marc, please.
May I?
- Who's the dark lady? - They call me "La Upa."
- How tasteless. - Since when was this party tasteful?
I'm in a strange mood.
Ready for anything!
I find you more appealing than usual.
You're such a dear, tonight.
Isn't he dumb!
And you, tonight, are so lovely!
But then, you're always lovely.
You bitch!
Some orangeade?
With a dash of arsenic, please.
- Beg your pardon? - I'll take it straight.
Angel, they're looking at us.
They're looking at us? Let them look, my sweet, mad thing!
She's quite insane tonight!
Buy me a drink?
Don't we fly! This way, princess.
Make way, bunch of... The lady is thirsty.
Would you like to take over? I surrender.
Not tonight. Tonight he's all yours, Marc.
Exactly! Tonight I only dance with Marc.
Marc the matador.
Get off my back!
Marc, tonight is our night.
- You're a pig. Don't let her down. - Okay, but it's the last dance.
Cut it out. Everyone's looking.
You're pissing me off. That's enough.
Marc, don't leave me.
Sir, tell her to quit. She's starting to bore me.
Quit or I'll punch you.
Shit!
You're dancing with my lover, Jezebel.
I said you're with my lover, whore.
You asshole! Piss off!
Heave ho!
What now?
Marc, my little one. Where do you hide them?
Here, Marc, it's here.
What are you afraid of?
Where does it hurt?
Fists won't do it, Marc. Wrong approach!
I'm ashamed. I'm just ashamed.
I feel those needles in the same places you do.
I itch in the same places you do.
- You'll get hurt. - Leave me alone.
You're low, but don't be afraid of that. You're real!
He pricked me!
He's nuts!
Excuse me.
A few years later...
Come and see.
Shall we take it?
Not so loud, he's coming.
You like it, huh?
It's not bad.
What more do you want?
A thousand square feet on rue Mademoiselle...
- You find it noisy? - A bit. Yes.
You're tough to please!
This is the living room.
That's how they make 'em now, spacious!
Few rooms, but lots of space.
I'd say go easy on the furniture, to keep that roomy feeling.
Did you notice the closets?
Closets to the right, closets to the left.
It's not cheap, though.
I don't agree. If I could afford it, I'd jump at it.
The bathroom. Glazed porcelain.
It is rather steep.
About the agency fee, since it's you, I can work something out.
I mean, we can work it out together.
It is strange seeing you again.
It's been a while. How long?
He hasn't changed. Still the...
On the other hand, you're a bit...
You look better now, more...
- When's the wedding? - What wedding?
You're so right!
I made the big mistake, and now...
So, let's go back to the agency and do a little paperwork.
- After you! - No, you go.
Come on!
After you!